Hey Substackers! Today I’m in the park rambling about overeating during the holidays, and how to avoid confrontation with mouthy family members! Love yall, and happy holidays! ‘Corey
I’m from a family all on the same wavelength when it comes to politics… helps that we have no cousins, aunt or uncles I guess. Though my ancient mother has some overlap with conservatives re the ol’ individual responsibility q (“ I was so poor and lived through the war, but I’ve saved up so much money because I’m so frugal and hard-working and responsible”- mum, dear, you married a doctor.) I don’t think any of us, for three generations, could picture having a family member who was a MAGA conservative, or even run of the mill old style republican
I'll chime in 😊 My parents passed many years ago, and so I don't have to deal with any of my family at ALL (thank the lawd). My mom would have 100% gone Qanon if she was alive. But anyway! So I have an awesome husband and beautiful 19-year-old daughter (Corey, you already known this but enjoy the FUCK outta these baby times! My kid's about to finish her second year of college! Madness, I tell you!) We usually spend Xmas eve with my husband's family, but we ALWAYS spend Xmas Day at home, just us.
(Well, this year's a little different. Japan here we come!) Luckily we've been able to avoid most political talk with family but I feel for those who are dealing with it. I HAVE been there. Take care and enjoy! ❤️ 🎄 ❄️ ⛄ ❤️
Edited to add: Don't listen to a damned thing I say below if you're on a medically-necessary diet. I was low-carbing for vanity reasons, mostly, and because I was physically uncomfortable with the extra weight pulling on my skin.
TLDR: Give yourself guiltless permission to go off your low-carb diet during the holidays (or all the time). It might not turn out as badly as you're worried it might.
Long version: OK, this might go over like a lead balloon, but I'm going to share my eating/dieting experience.
I started low carbing off and on around 2007. I had maybe 20 pounds I wanted to get rid of. I dropped weight easily, but I was sooooo deprived because I could never eat more than 20 grams in a day or I'd put on 5 pounds of water weight overnight that took days of strict limitations to reverse. My husband's knowledgeable in how stress hormones impact our bodies, but I kind of poo-pooed the information, thinking "Yeah, right, my THOUGHTS are impacting my weight? Pfffft. Sure, Jan."
A couple months ago I said "This is ridiculous. Life is too short to deprive myself of so many delicious foods. I can't even eat most FRUITS AND VEGETABLES without packing on the pounds." That switch in thinking, instead of telling myself "Oh, great, you decided to have some fresh-baked bread and beef stew loaded with starchy veggies. You know you're going to regret that when you step on the scale in the morning," has, for whatever reason, resulted in no appreciable weight being added. I fluctuate a pound or two, but have stayed pretty steady at 125, after gaining back some of the initial loss back in the day. Cortisol's a stress hormone that can impact your weight, and stopping that guilt-ridden thinking has stopped, apparently, the cortisol response for me.
So, all that to say, give yourself permission and stop stressing about the carbs and see what happens. If you decide to keep on it, I've got two unopened 3-pound boxes of CarbQuick I can send to your POA post office box.
I totally get what you're saying. Here's my example. I hope it inspires you and all the substackers out there. One time at an extended in law family gathering ( Thanksgiving or Xmas), I had fixed my plate and getting ready to sit at the "big boy" table. Just as soon as I sat down and started on my turkey, mashed potatoes, smothered in my mother in laws awesome gravy (RIP), IT started. This was 2017 so you can guess what this bunch of eastern KY conservatives wanted to talk about, ignoring the food flying from their mouths. I then got up, angry that I had just started eating, and went over to the kids table. This was truly a kids table. 14 to 20 inches tall. I sat cross legged and set my plate down. At first they were puzzled, for good reason. Finally one of them asked why I had intruded on their space. I simply took another bite of those mashed potatoes and said "grown ups, am I right?" to which they agreed and I enjoyed that dinner more than any before or since. Love you brother! Enjoy your holiday and thank you for continuing to share.
I guess that I’m the diamond in the rough. I come from a liberal bastion and at our holiday gatherings I find myself playing the devils advocate just so I don’t hear a sounding board. My father is the only one that I have diametrically opposed political and religious views. And we see each other on a weekly basis. My father and I have a close enough relationship that we can amicably disagree on issues and have conversations about them. You asked. -JDK
As my New England family migrated from mostly left-ish union democrats to Rush Limbaugh and anti-abortion righties, and as my political acumen increased, it became an unwritten rule that the family wouldn't talk politics when I was around (usually for holidays) as I would voice my viewpoints, to the point of being, maybe, arrogant. Now, instead of not talking politics, I just don't visit any longer after both of my parents have passed. I am a same-sex married gay man. When my once highly admired older cousin decided it was a good idea to tell me that he thought my mother was very disappointed in me over my sexuality and he considered my marriage a sham, all while I was attending to her while she was dying in a Florida hospital, I decided that I was done with all of them. AITA? Yeah, maybe.
Oh muh gawd, my sister-in-law's father was like the Jukebox from Hell, playing the Racist Tirade Hit Parade -- stick a quarter in his mouth and out came the rant -- word for word recited from every other family dinner. Family reaction was "Uh-oh, there he goes again... pay him no mind, have some more mashed potatoes, he will run down." He eventually did. My mother's home-made biscuits* usually sweetened his mood.
Nowadays with four children (age 2-1/2 to 9) the dinner conversation is dominated by what they want to eat and what they won't. Last year, they left the table to play with their new toys and we talked about movies. It was refreshing. (For example: what was the best Robin Williams role?)
I'm sorry you had a reaction to all the joy you shared with the other Reds in Nashville. Post-show adrenaline deficit? You probably just needed to rest up and let the adrenaline tank refill itself.
I know for a fact that I floated on happiness for at least ten days after seeing you guys in Asheville in May. I'm saving my money for Nashville next year. Or... maybe Asheville again? (please, please, please...)
As for surviving dinner with the politically benighted -- pray for some trivia fanatics on the guest list. Ask them for ideas for future "Puttin' on Airs" podcasts.
Have a cool Yule, enjoy your darlings, and keep writing.
*With home-made apple butter, cooked in a giant copper kettle, the way God intended.
PS: Take Kimberly Ann's advice about "considering the source."
Hey, Corey, your joy should be unlimited! Look at that precious child of yours! Anyway, when I run in to those who have radically opposing views, I find it helpful to just ask questions, "what do you consider a neutral news source?" and once they start spewing their OANN/Newsmax, I then ask them why they think those programs are telling the truth and what would be the benefit of ABC/NBC/CBS to tell lies. Try to focus on the root of the issue which is where they get their information. Try focusing on science and ask the "what is the benefit of lying" type of questions. Try not to judge but just to focus on the difference in the information they are getting and how you can understand their position considering their sources. Show them the bubble they live in without being too judgy. Make a tiny hole in their bubble.
If that fails, play with Bain, eat another slice of pie, talk about football, and know you are adored by thousands of like minded progressives (and they are NOT!).
Godless heathen liberal raised by godless heathen liberals smack dab in the buckle of the Bible Belt here and y’all, it freaking rocks. Got plenty of bass-ackwards extended family but we don’t really do the holidays with them anyway. I have plenty of holiday-related stress but none of it at Family Christmas.
I'm catching up on posts. This was sweet, funny and filled with good advice. Love you.
I’m from a family all on the same wavelength when it comes to politics… helps that we have no cousins, aunt or uncles I guess. Though my ancient mother has some overlap with conservatives re the ol’ individual responsibility q (“ I was so poor and lived through the war, but I’ve saved up so much money because I’m so frugal and hard-working and responsible”- mum, dear, you married a doctor.) I don’t think any of us, for three generations, could picture having a family member who was a MAGA conservative, or even run of the mill old style republican
I'll chime in 😊 My parents passed many years ago, and so I don't have to deal with any of my family at ALL (thank the lawd). My mom would have 100% gone Qanon if she was alive. But anyway! So I have an awesome husband and beautiful 19-year-old daughter (Corey, you already known this but enjoy the FUCK outta these baby times! My kid's about to finish her second year of college! Madness, I tell you!) We usually spend Xmas eve with my husband's family, but we ALWAYS spend Xmas Day at home, just us.
(Well, this year's a little different. Japan here we come!) Luckily we've been able to avoid most political talk with family but I feel for those who are dealing with it. I HAVE been there. Take care and enjoy! ❤️ 🎄 ❄️ ⛄ ❤️
Happy Holidays! Enjoy Bain's First Christmas 🎄
Edited to add: Don't listen to a damned thing I say below if you're on a medically-necessary diet. I was low-carbing for vanity reasons, mostly, and because I was physically uncomfortable with the extra weight pulling on my skin.
TLDR: Give yourself guiltless permission to go off your low-carb diet during the holidays (or all the time). It might not turn out as badly as you're worried it might.
Long version: OK, this might go over like a lead balloon, but I'm going to share my eating/dieting experience.
I started low carbing off and on around 2007. I had maybe 20 pounds I wanted to get rid of. I dropped weight easily, but I was sooooo deprived because I could never eat more than 20 grams in a day or I'd put on 5 pounds of water weight overnight that took days of strict limitations to reverse. My husband's knowledgeable in how stress hormones impact our bodies, but I kind of poo-pooed the information, thinking "Yeah, right, my THOUGHTS are impacting my weight? Pfffft. Sure, Jan."
A couple months ago I said "This is ridiculous. Life is too short to deprive myself of so many delicious foods. I can't even eat most FRUITS AND VEGETABLES without packing on the pounds." That switch in thinking, instead of telling myself "Oh, great, you decided to have some fresh-baked bread and beef stew loaded with starchy veggies. You know you're going to regret that when you step on the scale in the morning," has, for whatever reason, resulted in no appreciable weight being added. I fluctuate a pound or two, but have stayed pretty steady at 125, after gaining back some of the initial loss back in the day. Cortisol's a stress hormone that can impact your weight, and stopping that guilt-ridden thinking has stopped, apparently, the cortisol response for me.
So, all that to say, give yourself permission and stop stressing about the carbs and see what happens. If you decide to keep on it, I've got two unopened 3-pound boxes of CarbQuick I can send to your POA post office box.
I totally get what you're saying. Here's my example. I hope it inspires you and all the substackers out there. One time at an extended in law family gathering ( Thanksgiving or Xmas), I had fixed my plate and getting ready to sit at the "big boy" table. Just as soon as I sat down and started on my turkey, mashed potatoes, smothered in my mother in laws awesome gravy (RIP), IT started. This was 2017 so you can guess what this bunch of eastern KY conservatives wanted to talk about, ignoring the food flying from their mouths. I then got up, angry that I had just started eating, and went over to the kids table. This was truly a kids table. 14 to 20 inches tall. I sat cross legged and set my plate down. At first they were puzzled, for good reason. Finally one of them asked why I had intruded on their space. I simply took another bite of those mashed potatoes and said "grown ups, am I right?" to which they agreed and I enjoyed that dinner more than any before or since. Love you brother! Enjoy your holiday and thank you for continuing to share.
I guess that I’m the diamond in the rough. I come from a liberal bastion and at our holiday gatherings I find myself playing the devils advocate just so I don’t hear a sounding board. My father is the only one that I have diametrically opposed political and religious views. And we see each other on a weekly basis. My father and I have a close enough relationship that we can amicably disagree on issues and have conversations about them. You asked. -JDK
As my New England family migrated from mostly left-ish union democrats to Rush Limbaugh and anti-abortion righties, and as my political acumen increased, it became an unwritten rule that the family wouldn't talk politics when I was around (usually for holidays) as I would voice my viewpoints, to the point of being, maybe, arrogant. Now, instead of not talking politics, I just don't visit any longer after both of my parents have passed. I am a same-sex married gay man. When my once highly admired older cousin decided it was a good idea to tell me that he thought my mother was very disappointed in me over my sexuality and he considered my marriage a sham, all while I was attending to her while she was dying in a Florida hospital, I decided that I was done with all of them. AITA? Yeah, maybe.
Oh muh gawd, my sister-in-law's father was like the Jukebox from Hell, playing the Racist Tirade Hit Parade -- stick a quarter in his mouth and out came the rant -- word for word recited from every other family dinner. Family reaction was "Uh-oh, there he goes again... pay him no mind, have some more mashed potatoes, he will run down." He eventually did. My mother's home-made biscuits* usually sweetened his mood.
Nowadays with four children (age 2-1/2 to 9) the dinner conversation is dominated by what they want to eat and what they won't. Last year, they left the table to play with their new toys and we talked about movies. It was refreshing. (For example: what was the best Robin Williams role?)
I'm sorry you had a reaction to all the joy you shared with the other Reds in Nashville. Post-show adrenaline deficit? You probably just needed to rest up and let the adrenaline tank refill itself.
I know for a fact that I floated on happiness for at least ten days after seeing you guys in Asheville in May. I'm saving my money for Nashville next year. Or... maybe Asheville again? (please, please, please...)
As for surviving dinner with the politically benighted -- pray for some trivia fanatics on the guest list. Ask them for ideas for future "Puttin' on Airs" podcasts.
Have a cool Yule, enjoy your darlings, and keep writing.
*With home-made apple butter, cooked in a giant copper kettle, the way God intended.
PS: Take Kimberly Ann's advice about "considering the source."
Hey, Corey, your joy should be unlimited! Look at that precious child of yours! Anyway, when I run in to those who have radically opposing views, I find it helpful to just ask questions, "what do you consider a neutral news source?" and once they start spewing their OANN/Newsmax, I then ask them why they think those programs are telling the truth and what would be the benefit of ABC/NBC/CBS to tell lies. Try to focus on the root of the issue which is where they get their information. Try focusing on science and ask the "what is the benefit of lying" type of questions. Try not to judge but just to focus on the difference in the information they are getting and how you can understand their position considering their sources. Show them the bubble they live in without being too judgy. Make a tiny hole in their bubble.
If that fails, play with Bain, eat another slice of pie, talk about football, and know you are adored by thousands of like minded progressives (and they are NOT!).
Godless heathen liberal raised by godless heathen liberals smack dab in the buckle of the Bible Belt here and y’all, it freaking rocks. Got plenty of bass-ackwards extended family but we don’t really do the holidays with them anyway. I have plenty of holiday-related stress but none of it at Family Christmas.