Every day I wake up and curse the man I was at night
I promise myself that I’ll break free from his bondage and carve a new path
As the light moves further west I can feel it slipping away
My strength. My courage. My pride
“No god damn you!” I curse to the heavens
I let the darkness envelope me in its cold and unforgiving bosom
They say early to bed
And early to rise
Makes a young boy happy
Healthy, and wise
Yet each day I feel my wits grow dimmer
Even as I lie in bed awaiting the moon’s call to stage
The weighted blanket can’t smother the demons
The sitcom reruns can only distract them for so long
I told myself I wouldn’t do it again
All day it was my mantra
Be strong. Be brave. Be a man
But the clock moves like a plague
Unforgiving and cruel
I’ve been here before
And I know how this ends
So I breathe a sigh of shame
In the direction of my wife
She stirs around to confront me
“what are you waiting for?” She says
And for once in my life
I have not an answer
She’s right
All I have done
And all I will ever do
Is prolong the inevitable
My knees crackle as I fling them
Over the bed and to the floor
To begin my coward’s march
Towards the light of the fridge
And yet another pint of ice cream
Meets its demise
i didn’t say you could write a poem about me!
Love love love and I thought it was going toward those depression demons…