Traveling 12 hours in the backseat of a pickup truck leaves me stoved-up for ‘bout a week after. I’ve never actually looked up the phrase “stoved up,” but it’s how my Granny Bain used to describe her back after sittin’ in them old wooden pews when the Baptist Preacher went on too long and the look on her face then matches the one on my face now, so I’m gonna assume I’m using it right.
Sure we could take a flight into Des Moines for Thanksgiving and then have the In-laws pick us up and drive us the hour to Webster City, Iowa… but where’s the fun in that? If we did that, then we wouldn’t have the distinct pleasure of listening to the same cassette tape of The Eagles Greatest Hits from Chickamauga to Paduka, and by god, I’m a man who believes in tradition!
Our tradition is going to Webster City, Iowa, every thanksgiving to see my wife’s family; The Jansens and The Roberts! It’s actually more of a Thankmas or maybe a Christgiving if you will (sorry, I’m silly) because we have to cram the two holidays into one. I’d love to tell you it’s just because, logistically, it makes sense for everyone traveling only to do it one time a season, and yes, technically, that’s true. Still, the real reason we cram the two holidays together is because of my selfish ass.
The WellRED boys and I have a long-standing residency at Zanies in Nashville every year around Christmas time (December 16-18 this year), where we do our Homecoming shows and close out the tour for the year. It is without question the thing I look most forward to all year and something that I never cease to be amazed that I am allowed to do. Zanies is one of the best comedy clubs in the country, and to feel like a natural part of that family and to have sold-out shows full of some of our most die-hard fans during my favorite season of the year makes me cry every single time. Add in the post-show Karaoke at Santa’s Pub, all the hot chicken we have catered, and the rotating door of family and friends that are there for the weekend. It’s so joyful you almost don’t care that some of them are only interested in us picking up their check (That’s a joke, Cousin Walter.. can’t wait to see you!)
Anyways I said all that to say that because we have the week before Christmas slot every year at Zanies, I am unable to travel to Iowa with my wife and her family. When I first broached the subject, I did it with heavy trepidation as I was very fearful it would not go well. Amber and I had only been together a little while, and I was already coming in and telling them that I would not be a part of one of their greatest family traditions. Just who the hell did I think I was? “Oh, so this is what happens when you get a book published and get to meet Whoopi Goldberg, huh? All of a sudden, family doesn’t mean anything to you!” they’d say, “Well, that’s fine… us Iowans don’t need ya! We’ve got our tenderloin and Casey’s breakfast pizza, and with you gone, there will be more Pickle wraps for everyone, you ungrateful bastard!”
But that’s not what happened. What happened was that everyone decided that my Christmas tradition was just as important as theirs and that a compromise isn’t the end of the world. That’s when I knew I was not just someone married to their daughter/granddaughter/cousin. No, I was part of the family. A big family.
I think it is important during this holiday season that we give thanks not only for the family we were born into but also we chose or for the family that chose us. That could mean in-laws or, in many cases, just very close friends. The holiday season can be rough, and some people cannot speak to their loved ones due to death or, perhaps more tragically, in some cases… an estrangement. But to me, family isn’t just in your blood… it’s in your heart.
I’m lucky enough to have both kinds
, and you’ll never hear me complain.
I hope your Thanksgiving was half as good as mine.
‘Corey