Corey’s Diary 5/12/2026
I spent the weekend in a tiny town in Illinois hanging out with my friends in the company of professional wrestling legends. I got to watch Warlord and Barbarian team up with JBL in a match, speak to Jimmy Hart about the time he sent my dad a get well video after he’d had a heart attack, and watch Mick Foley speak candidly for 45 minutes about how much he loved the fans, all while sitting criss-cross applesauce on the floor monitoring his audio levels. What a dream of a life I have!
Jimmy Harts New Jacket Featuring a Funko Pop of Himself is Amazing & I’m Obsessed
That said, I am exhausted. It is very unfortunate that being around a lot of people for an extended period of time (in this case 3 days) wipes me out completely, but it’s just reality. No matter how much sleep I get, no matter how healthy I eat, and no matter how much water I drink, nothing seems to work. So naturally since I know it doesn’t matter, I barely slept, ate like shit, and drank like the Prohis were on their way to confiscate all the liquor in Illinois.
The drive home Sunday morning was actually peaceful though, as I gave my pain to god by taking a weed gummy and slow sipping a CBD hybrid seltzer. The fact that our government has criminalized this wonderful plant is the strongest case for there to be a violent revolution where we overthrow and behead every last one of them. Just so we are clear (in the event there are agents reading this cause I’m on a list) I’m speaking purely hyperbolic for comedy purposes. I do not think a group of young people without children or anything to lose should start a well organized militia and attack CEOs from Silicon Valley to Manhattan and hold them hostage until they can convince our political leaders to give us healthcare and spread their massive unearned wealth to the poorest communities so that no one has to starve in “the worlds greatest country”. I’m not saying that at all. That would be bad. Especially if they live-streamed themselves impaling all of them in 4k so I could watch, popcorn in hand on my couch. Don’t do that!
Now I’m home and starting to get my energy back. It takes longer than it used to, and it seems I’ve had more lows than highs lately, but like everything, my mental health is cyclical and I know I’ll be back on top soon. I’m sure that when that happens though, RFK Jr and Trump will solidify their plan to take away my depression and anxiety medication. Oh well, I’m sure taking a walk will completely rewire my fucked up brain chemistry just like they say it will, even though me and millions of people have tried that and it didn’t work. Maybe it’s because we weren’t wearing Trump shoes and we weren’t using our Trump phones. Maybe we’ve got a bad case of TDS and if we’d just accept him as our lord and savior then all our faults will be corrected through him, which strengthens us.
Hopefully. If not, though, I’m going to form that pitch fork mob I was just joking about.
I’m off to nap with the boy and then get some work done! I will see yall tomorrow!
More later
Corey
Like my work? Consider becoming a PAID subscriber! I’ll always let you read my stuff for free as I don’t like Paywalls, but if it adds value to your life then hey, I’ll take it!
Don’t like recurring payments but still wanna support? I take one time donations, PBS style, of any amount big or small on PayPal at ButterCreamCorey@gmail.com
And on Venmo @ButterCreamCorey
QR codes for both are below! Thank you for your support!
Sounds like a great weekend!
Thanks, Corey!