Are You Not Entertained?

Trump’s UFC 250

If you are one of the millions of people who would rather be kicked in the head than attend Donald Trump’s 80th birthday party, then it might come as a shock to you that some people are choosing to do both! That’s right, on June 14, you can take a break from the horrors scrolling past you on the news ticker and instead tune in to watch a very on-the-nose display of panem et circenses as our chest-puffing government welcomes MMA fighters to compete on the White House lawn in what is being called UFC 250 (a nod to our nation’s 250th birthday).

For anyone who isn’t a stereotypical middle-aged man who thinks about the Roman Empire every hour on the hour, panem et circenses is Latin for “Bread and Circus,” long been attributed to Juvenal, a poet from the late first and early second century (not to be confused with Juvenile, a poet from the late 20th and early 21st century). Bread and Circus refers to a politician distracting his people from difficult times with superficialities – bread doles and circuses.

Trump’s juvenile social media posts are one form of the circus. His late night rage posts are his version of the gladiator contests in ancient Rome – his throwing of his enemies to the lionsInstead of pointing his thumb up for approval and down for disapproval, he uses his thumbs to pen barely coherent takedowns for social media. We laugh or cringe at his AI videos and images depicting himself“dunking” on his opponents or position himself as some type of alpha male superhero of Jesus, say. But most of us still see the hunched-over, mottled, and puffy person behind the posts. .

Trump asks “ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?” And his sycophantic masses, behind on rent and on the verge of losing their jobs to AI automation, respond, “We are!”

I have no doubt that if he were Nero or Caligula or the weirdly lesser-known Commodus, he would happily throw his detractors into a literal lion’s den..

It’s important to remember that the Roman Empire didn’t fall to barbaric forces breaking down the gates and taking over the regime. It fell because the emperor treated the empire like a personal piggy bank. The Roman Senate was filled with sycophants who wanted to protect their riches without a care for the people they were sworn to represent.

Sound familiar?

Take Commodus, for example. Joaquin Phoenix made us all hate him in the epic 2000 masterpiece “Gladiator.” Commodus was a nepo baby who didn’t earn a single thing in his life and pranced around as if he were God‘s gift to man and silenced anyone who suggested otherwise. He would traipse into the Colosseum and slaughter bound and defenseless animals – and disabled human beings. He got his cheers, some of which came from the truly demented people who actually supported his actions, but most probably from people who were just terrified.

And what did emperors do when times got tough? Did they make sacrifices for the good of the people? Did they minimize their extravagance to provide economic relief for the people starving around them? No, they did not. They just made the Colosseum games even crazier. Look at these violent battles I’ve arranged for your entertainment. Do not worry about inflation.

Because, obviously, the best place to have people looking while you steal from their pockets is somewhere else. Bonus points if in that somewhere else is a lion biting the head off of an enslaved person.

On Sunday, we won’t see lions bite anyone’s heads off. But we will see history repeat itself yet again. Only this time and even more conveniently for our modern Nero, this spectacle isn’t only limited to those who can actually make their way to the Colosseum. It’ll be broadcast on CBS, with Americans sitting in the digital bleachers of a collapsing empire, watching gladiators trade blows on a blood- and sweat-stained mat proudly displaying the name of a company so soulless that it would advertise on such a spectacle.

America at 250, the perfect modern manifestation of bread and circuses. This time, though, there is no bread.

More later.

Corey

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