1/20/2023 - Hospital Waiting Room
1/20/2023 - Hospital Waiting Room
As many of you know, the wife and I are expecting a bouncing (and most likely tyrannical) baby boy this April! Amber is 7 months pregnant and so far her only symptom has been pointing out how wrong I am about stuff on a more frequent basis. I think maternal instincts kick in early and make you able to spot bullshit quicker. This will come in handy if our son is anything like his old man.
We are currently sitting in a private waiting room. Amber is taking a glucose test that will have us Piddlin around here for around 4 hours. She is restless and bored. I myself am in heaven!
Firstly (and not to sound cheesy) but I love hanging out with my wife! I understand that when you’ve been together for 30-40 you may grow apart and spend less time together, but it’s always been weird to me how many people my age seem to never wanna hang out with their spouse. Why did you marry them in the first place??
I have buddies invite me to bars and stuff every weekend and I never go. They’ll always begin by saying “oh so the ole ball and chain won’t let you outta the house?” No. That’s not it at all. I just like her more than y’all. If that wasn’t true I probably wouldn’t have bought a house with her. Plus if I make her a steak she might touch my ding dong! Something none of my friends would ever do (sober)
Another reason I’m so happy is because I have a hard time taking a break from work. If I’m at home there is always something I could be doing, and if I get too relaxed I feel guilty. “Other entertainers are working right now, Corey… what’s your excuse” I’ll say to myself, putting the salsa back in the fridge and slinking back upstairs to make a video with fart noises in it (ok.. my work is fun)
When Amber told me she had a 4 hour test on Friday, I immediately jumped at the chance to let her know I’d support her! Half because I love her, and half because I could read comic books the whole time and not be tempted to work cause I wouldn’t be near my computer!!
oh. Shit. I just realized the irony of writing this blog post while she stares at me in this waiting room. Ok. I’ll shut up now
Here’s hoping she don’t have too much Glucose!
Later y’all!
The glucose test is no fun and I hope her sugars are good but tell her to remember if she does have GD it’s nothing she did, it’s just the placenta being a jerk. GD is a pain in the ass but after you get used to the routine it’s livable.
She will probably feel queasy after. Make sure you stop and get her a good sandwich.